


cool cool cool cool (no doubt no doubt)

by apaixono



Series: Seoul Nine-Nine [1]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Gen, Inspired by Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV), M/M, b99 au, introductory post or whatever, no plot whatsoever lol just some worldbuilding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-20
Updated: 2019-05-20
Packaged: 2020-02-09 21:32:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18646492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apaixono/pseuds/apaixono
Summary: A not-so-normal Tuesday morning at the ninety-ninth precinct of the Seoul National Police, featuring: a new captain, search warrants, and missing juice pops.





	cool cool cool cool (no doubt no doubt)

It's almost ten in the morning in the Nine-Nine. The ancient coffee machine is slowly dripping the precinct's lifeblood into the stained coffee pot with a Pororo sticker on the handle, the telephones are singing their shrill songs above the cacophony of voices, and the sound of keyboards clacking provide a stable beat along with the shuffling of papers. It seems like a normal Tuesday morning, the precinct still slowly waking and warming up—until a police officer crashes into the bullpen, dropping his hat in the process.

“He’s here!”

For one moment, the entire precinct freezes. Keyboards stop clacking, printers stop whirring, phones stop ringing, even the ancient coffee maker in the break room stops whistling. But the realization dawns on everyone, and the spell is broken as everyone yelps and quickly moves to put things in order in time. File stacks straightened, drawers shut, chairs pushed back rather than left spinning mindlessly. Footfalls fill the bullpen as everyone scrambles to gather in front of the gate, hushed mumblings that are either speculations or admonishments on messy collars and hairstyles filling the room with low noise. A soft sigh on what was, another heavy one on what could be, a whisper of a joke referencing to the militia in Mulan, and an elbow jab to shut said joke up, all muffled behind a grumble of _so much for policemen always being on time_ that eventually gets drowned by one decisive sound:

 _Ding_.

The ancient elevator doors shudder open, and behind it reveals a tall, honey-skinned man, dressed in his full police uniform. His chest boasts of shiny pins showing his many achievements, and tucked under his gloved arm is his captain’s hat. His steps are powerful, calculated, almost regal as he steps out and makes his way towards the gate.

“Good morning, 99th Precinct,” He says with a warm smile, his voice deep but gentle. “I am Captain Choi Siwon, and I will be your new commanding officer. I look forward to working with you. Let us take care of one another, and of the community.”

The entire precinct, for all its hustle and bustle earlier, is rendered speechless. Their previous commanding officer was ruthless, strict, and overall an asshole. They couldn’t even mumble a joke when he’s around, let alone approach him. No one even complained when he was reassigned, something he was expecting them to do, and the first day without him in the office is the first time they all breathed properly in a long, long time. But standing here in front of them is the exact opposite, a true leader that they can lean on for support, someone who looks like they can have a good time with _and_ catch criminals, and it all feels like a fever dream. Their commanding officer just greeted them good morning. This _has_ to be a dream.

“Captain Choi.” A short man bravely steps forward, gummy smile making his eyes crinkle. “Sergeant Kim Minseok. On behalf of the 99, it is a pleasure to meet you and to be working with you. Please take care of us.” Minseok bows deeply, and the precinct gapes when Captain Choi returns the bow. _This man is not real_.

“Sergeant Kim, so nice to see you again. Come with me to my office for a moment, please.” Captain Choi nods, a dimple showing on his perfectly chiseled face. “And for the rest of the squad, you may return to work. Thank you once again for the warm welcome. Dismissed.”

The captain and the sergeant stride towards the captain’s office, the still gaping squad parting to make way like the red sea. Minseok holds open the door for Captain Choi and dutifully closes it behind him.

“So, Sgt. Minseok, how is the Nine-Nine treating you so far?” Capt. Choi asks pleasantly as he takes a seat on his office chair. “It’s been so long since our joint operation. You were in the Nine-One back then, yes?”

“I was, sir.” Minseok nods cheerfully. “Those were fun times, but I’m happy here at the Nine-Nine. I’ve got a good team, and I’m sure they’ll love you.”

“I sure hope so. They didn’t seem so psyched when I arrived.” Capt. Choi’s comical eyebrows knit together slightly. “Do they...not like me?”

“Oh! No, no sir, they were just shocked.” The sergeant assures him quickly. “Our previous commanding officer, Captain Lee, wasn’t...as warm and welcoming, so to speak.”

“Ah.” Capt. Choi grimaces. “I had him as an instructor back in the academy. It was rather...traumatizing, to say at the very least, and the department never runs out of complaints about him. I think it’s the reason why he was transferred to the head office, just so the higher ups can control him more.”

“If I may be completely honest for one moment, sir, I’m glad he’s gone,” Minseok says, shaking his head somberly. “We have been crippled by his tyrannical ways, we couldn’t even push through with some operations sometimes. All my men are good detectives, and it’s time that the 99 had a real leader so they can maximize their potential.”

“Well, they have you, don’t they?” Capt. Choi stands up and claps his shoulder, and Minseok bows gratefully. “So tell me more about your squad.”

They both walk towards the window of Capt. Choi’s office, peering through the partially closed blinds. “The table in front of you is Jongin’s. He’s the precinct’s administrative assistant, and will mostly be at your beck and call. If you need anything, Jongin can do it for you.” Minseok points at the beautiful honey-skinned man typing away in his computer. “Jongin used to train to become a cop, but he got multiple injuries from dancing and never made it out of the Academy. But even though his main job is doing admin work, he usually helps out in the logistics of operations, and his connections with the secretary pool has been helpful in collaborations with other units and precincts.”

Minseok then points to the empty table across the bullpen. “That’s my table, sir. Behind me is the briefing room, and the hallway in front of me leads to the interrogation room, soft rooms, evidence lockup, and bathrooms. I can see you from my table so if you need me just wave.”

“In front of my desk is Detective Oh Sehun. He’s the youngest in the precinct, but his numbers almost rival Junmyeon’s and Kyungsoo’s. Top of his class in the Academy, worked for a private investigator before coming here. He’s very skilled, and rumors say he gets recruited by the FBI every year.” A tall, handsome man in a black turtleneck tersely flips through a case file, eyebrows furrowed in thought. “Don’t be fooled by his stoic face, though. He’s a real softie, and even the higher ups are smitten by him. Detective Oh is our precinct’s baby, and I’m sure you’ll find yourself adoring him before you know it.”

“Sharing Detective Sehun’s desk is Detective Kim Jongdae. A legend in undercover and joint operations, but somehow he’s the loudest in the entire precinct.” Even from behind the thick window, the two men could almost hear the kittenish man with wavy blond hair laughing at whatever is on his computer screen, his eyes crinkling with mirth. “His incessant whining notwithstanding, Detective Jongdae is great with people. If you need personnel management help or someone to man the soft rooms, he’s your guy.”

“Behind Detectives Sehun and Jongdae’s desk are Detectives Byun Baekhyun and Park Chanyeol, respectively. They’re partners, and inseparable ones at that. It’s rare that they take separate operations, because they work really well together. They also play around a lot, but I can assure you that they’re really good at what they do.” Minseok gestures to the table where a small man with broad shoulders and pretty hands hit the taller in front of him with a rather thick file folder on the arm, making the latter’s black curls bounce as he flinches. “Detective Park has been part of many successful sting operations, and Detective Byun is one of, if not the best negotiator in the city, but despite their stellar records they’re just two overgrown puppies. They’re also dating, in case you were wondering, and also in case you walk in on them cuddling in the couch.” 

“Interesting. I was just about to ask, because they do look quite comfortable together. Cute.” Capt. Choi smiles fondly as he watches Baekhyun ruffle Chanyeol’s poodle hair with a laugh, most likely in apology. He then points to the two detectives yet to be introduced who look like they are in a heated argument over something on the screen. “And them?”

Minseok’s smile grows wider, and he noticeably stands up straighter. “Sir, meet the two best detectives of the precinct, the pride of the Nine-Nine: Detectives Doh Kyungsoo and Kim Junmyeon.” The sergeant pointed to the man on the left, the one with round eyes behind horn-rimmed glasses and full lips who is angrily jabbing at the computer screen. “Detective Doh is one of our youngest detectives, but he has one of the best numbers in the _entire_ Seoul National Police. He’s batchmates with Baekhyun, Chanyeol, and Jongdae in the Academy, and he graduated top of his class with honors. He doesn’t have a specialty because he’s that good of a detective, he gets the job done no matter what. He’s a little shy and sometimes can get a little violent when the others bug him too much, but he’s a good kid. Don’t feel bad if he glares at you too, sometimes he just forgets his glasses.”

“Perhaps the only detective that can match Detective Doh’s skills is Detective Kim Junmyeon. He’s one of the oldest detectives here, both in age and in work experience, and that helped him climb up the ranks into one of the best detectives in the entire force. He’s partners and sort of rivals with Detective Doh, as you can see.” The man on the right with fair skin and peach-like cheeks promptly swats Detective Doh’s hand away and points at another part with his pen. “Top of his class, with high honors, went on Academy and FBI-sponsored trainings abroad. Holds the record for most collars in the district for three years now and has two Medal of Valors. He’s also the de facto leader of the precinct, and also everyone’s favorite hyung. For all his intimidating achievements, he’s just like the precinct’s dorky dad.”

“Impressive. Very impressive. I’ve heard about Detective Doh before, and I’ve worked with a case that Detective Kim handled before it was raffled to Major Crimes. I look forward to working with them,” Capt. Choi says, watching the partners thoughtfully. “Are they...dating, as well?”

Minseok does a double take at his boss, who is still peering through the blinds pensively. “Sir?”

“Are they dating as well? Because Detective Kim seems quite fond of Detective Doh.” Capt. Choi nods at the window, and Minseok turns just in time to catch Junmyeon staring at Kyungsoo wistfully while the latter scans the computer screen. Even from afar and behind the shutters, he looks lovestruck. “Or is this some unrequited pining of some sort?”

“Actually, Sir—“ Minseok begins to explain, but the words die in his throat when Kyungsoo looks back at Junmyeon and their gazes meet. They stay like that for a beat, maybe two, before a telephone rings faintly and they both scramble to answer it. The sergeant groans at the disrupted moment, and Capt. Choi looks at him amusedly.

“Is there an office betting pool on when Detectives Doh and Kim will get together?” He asks, but not unkindly. Actually, he seems rather interested. “Their bumbling is kind of cute, once you think about it. Almost like two high schoolers stumbling through puberty and trigonometry.”

“As a matter of fact, Sir, there _is_ a betting pool,” Minseok says, grinning. “And yes, we all agree. Junmyeon and Kyungsoo are...to put it one way, in denial. They pretend to be rivals especially in work, but we know about their huge crushes on each other. They’re stellar cops, but they really suck at hiding and handling their feelings. Sometimes I feel like I’m in some office-themed fanfiction.”

“Interesting. And the current pot for the said bet?” Capt. Choi hums, a playful smile on his lips making a dimple show rather prominently on his tanned cheek.

“Currently at 150,000 won. Jongdae bet the 40,000 that they’ll get together after Valentine’s Day.” Minseok answers. “Baekhyun, on the other hand, thinks they’ll never get together. All the other bets are within that range.”

Capt. Choi snorts before reaching inside his coat, rummaging through an inner pocket. He pulls out a 50,000 won note and hands it to Minseok without looking away from the pair. “Major development by White Day, but they’ll get together by the holidays earliest.”

“S-sir?” The sergeant blinks at the wad of money rather disbelievingly. Their old CO won’t even chip in for a birthday present to the _Commissioner_ , and here is Captain Choi, placing a bet in a simple office betting pool. The surprises just keep coming and coming.

“They look good together, if I can say so myself. Would be a shame if this romcom-esque pining is for naught, no?” Capt. Choi grins at him before walking back to his desk, Minseok still gaping at him. “Now brief me regarding your current open cases.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“I told you, our informant is on to something! We finally have a lead!”

“And I also told you that your informant’s tip is not weighty enough to establish probable cause!” Kyungsoo huffs, throwing a sheaf of paper on the table frustratedly. "Give up, Junmyeon. We need more info before we can get our search warrants."

"My informant has a _video_ ," Junmyeon replies testily, jabbing a finger at his computer screen. "And his testimony corroborates the surveillance reports of the Eight-Six. At this rate, we can even arrest him in flagrante delicto if we want to."

"You know we can't do that." Kyungsoo frowns. "That's—"

"—Basic criminal procedure. I know. Give me some credit." Junmyeon rolls his eyes, standing up and gathering their paperwork, including the slightly wrinkled sheaf that Kyungsoo threw earlier. "You know what, I'll never win with you. Let's just ask the captain what he thinks so he can decide what to do. Happy?"

"Fine." The wide-eyed man grabs the paperwork from Junmyeon and stalks towards the captain's office without waiting for his partner, knocking on the door thrice. The moment he hears the bright "Enter!" he pushes the door and walks in. The door closes just when Junmyeon reaches it, and Kyungsoo hides a satisfied smirk behind their files when the latter scrambles inside.

"To what do I owe the pleasure, Detectives?" Capt. Choi asks them pleasantly, signing a piece of paper with a flourish before looking up at them.

"Sir, we would like to ask for your advice with the Young car hijacking ring," Kyungsoo says, handing the case files to the captain. "Detective Kim and I are...in disagreement, to say at the very least, whether we have probable cause to conduct a search in their warehouse."

"Hmm. Do you have proof that can satisfy the judge so we can obtain a warrant?" Capt. Choi asks as he flips through the file. 

"We do, but personally I think it's not conclusive enough," Kyungsoo replies. "They're all circumstantial at best, and it won't be enough to justify a warrantless search, let alone satisfy a judge enough to grant us a warrant."

"You have a video, though?" Capt. Choi holds up printout of screencaps from the surveillance video Junmyeon's informant managed to obtain for them. "And you can clearly see his face."

"That's what I was telling Detective Doh, sir," Junmyeon pipes up, voice even even as he glares at his partner. "But apparently positive identification is not enough for a warrant."

"He was just passing by the warehouse," Kyungsoo mutters testily. "Hardly suspicious behavior—"

"He passes by the warehouse _four times_ a day. He checks the locks on his first and fourth visits. He peeked inside once, too," Junmyeon interrupts, voice hardening ever so slightly. "If it were the uniformed men, they'd have enough probable cause for a stop and frisk already on the first day alone. We have a week's worth of CCTV footage on top of stakeouts and CI tips."

"But we're not uniformed men, we're detectives, and for a search operation we need a warrant, not a surveillance op." Kyungsoo counters. "I'm telling you, this isn't enough for a judge—"

"We only need to establish probable cause, not guilt right away." Junmyeon huffs, clearly annoyed now. "Maybe for you this isn't enough, but you're not the district judge, so—"

"Gentlemen?"

Both detectives stop their bickering to turn to their captain, who is watching them rather amusedly. "It seems like you both have made up your minds, albeit on different solutions. Both have merits as well, and it seems both are viable options." Captain Choi closes the file in front of him. "Have you tried running it through the DA?"

"Sir?" The pair blinks slowly, confusedly, comically in sync as they process their captain's words.

"Did you consult the DA's office? I'm sure they have the answer to this conundrum," Capt. Choi says. "The lawyers there can help you fix your request for a search warrant, too."

Junmyeon and Kyungsoo turn to each other, at a loss for words. "We...haven't consulted the DA," Junmyeon replies slowly, an epiphany slowly dawning on them both.

"We didn't think of asking them," Kyungsoo adds rather sheepishly. "We just...fought."

Capt. Choi stares at them blankly, almost disbelievingly, and they both gulp rather audibly and ready themselves for their new captain's first scream fest. They know they messed up big time, on a rookie mistake no less, and they know the captain's patience can only stretch for so long. It's not unlikely that the warm, smiley greetings were just a façade—they just didn't expect their two day-old argument would be the thing to break it.

To their surprise, however—this day seems to be full of surprises—Capt. Choi bursts out laughing, his eyes crinkling and his grin wide and boyish. "I'm going to be honest, I didn't quite expect this after the smattering of praise that your sergeant gave you two earlier," He says amusedly. "But even the best make mistakes, especially in such a busy case. I understand how easy it is to get swept away and forget the more basic solutions—like asking for help. And perhaps listening to each other a little better."

Junmyeon and Kyungsoo glance at each other before bowing their heads, admonished. The Young case has been bothering them for almost two years now and even got sent to the back burner for a while, but when Junmyeon's informant got them the videos they haven't stopped working on rebuilding the case for weeks. The desire to put an end on all this has indeed been taking a toll on them and their professional relationship. Capt. Choi was right.

"I suggest one of you run to the DA right now to have them look at this. It's still quite early, so if the folks there think it's enough for a warrant, they can file the request today before courts close." Capt. Choi hands them back the file. "Will that be all, detectives?"

"Yes, sir. Thank you for your help. We'll work harder." Junmyeon answers, taking the folder from the captain and standing up to bow lowly, Kyungsoo scrambling to follow suit.

"You two work hard enough. Just be careful next time so as to save you the trouble." Capt. Choi beams at them. "Dismissed. Oh, and if you bump into Prosecutor Kim Ryeowook at the DA's office, please say hello for me, and that he still owes me lunch."

"Will do, sir. Thank you again." The partners bow once again in unison before exiting the captain's office, gently closing the door behind them. The precinct is oddly empty, and the two walk quietly back to their tables side by side, not looking at each other.

"Hey, I'm—" "So I—" They both start speaking at the same time when they reach their desks, and the awkward spell is broken by their surprised yet still synchronized laughter.

"Look, I'm sorry, I've been such a dick, I should've listened to you," Kyungsoo says. "You're right, we do have evidence. I don't know why I'm holding this case back."

"No, you were just being careful, and that's a good thing. Maybe I was the one being rash, because I'm so desperate to close this case." Junmyeon shakes his head at him. "I'm sorry, too."

"We're both in the wrong." Kyungsoo concedes. "But I wasn't the one who provided an informant, nor was I the one who bulked up the case. This one's on me."

"Kyungsoo—" Junmyeon sighs, but the latter holds up a hand.

"It's fine, Junmyeon hyung, I swear. Let me make it up to you, yeah? I'll be the one to bring this to the DA. I know how much you don't like the secretaries there." Kyungsoo takes the folder from him with a smile. "Maybe drop by the bakery downtown afterwards. Do you want anything?"

"I'm fine, thanks," He replies. "Do you...want me to come with you? I'm sure I can spare some patience for the DA."

Kyungsoo seems to consider it, opening his mouth before pausing and closing it again. "I'm good, it's a long walk anyway," He says instead, a shadow of hesitation clouding his normally bright eyes. "You sure you don't want anything to eat? Are you planning to stress starve again?"

"No, no, I have leftovers packed for lunch." Junmyeon points to his red and yellow Iron Man lunchbox, a tiny insulated bag he got on sale in the children's section of the department store. Minseok has a matching Captain America one. "You sure you don't need me to go with you?"

"I'm a grown man, hyung. I can make my way to and from the DA in one piece." The wide-eyed jokes. "Don't worry, worst comes to worst, I will go down with a fight. Represent the Nine-Nine well and all that."

Junmyeon rolls his eyes and hits Kyungsoo on the shoulder, earning him a bark of laughter. "Just go, before the bitchy paralegal explodes at you again for being late even if courts close in like, three hours." He waves him off. "And be careful. Erm. Out there."

"I'm going to the District Attorney's Office, hyung, not to war." Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, but he's smiling. "Text me if you change your mind. I heard the bakery make great sticky buns."

"I will, now _go_ ," Junmyeon says, and Kyungsoo waves at him before jogging to catch the elevator before it closes. He waits for the steel doors shudder close before he lets out a loud, pained groan and sinks down on his office chair, burying his face in his hands.

"Why so glum, chum? Someone ate your last juice pop?" Jongdae asks, emerging from the break room with a popsicle that suspiciously looks like Junmyeon's last strawberry one halfway in his mouth. They bought a huge box last week and split it equally amongst themselves (Baekhyun spent an afternoon labeling each one with a marker), but the younger ones ran out faster and are slowly pilfering their hyungs' supplies. "If it was lemon, Sehun is almost done with it. If it was strawberry, then I invoke my right against self-incrimination."

"Nothing," He mumbles, still wallowing in despair. "Leave me alone."

"Aw, c'mon. Misery loves company, hyung." Jongdae grabs the chair beside his desk reserved for witnesses, spins it around and straddles it casually. "Why the grumbles?"

Junmyeon sighs deeply before laying his head on his desk glumly. "Made a fool out of myself today," He explains sadly. "Kyungsoo and I have been fighting about whether or not we had enough evidence for a warrant, we didn't think of consulting the guys at the DA."

"Ah. Kyungsoo problems." Jongdae shakes his head, grinning. "So you're angry at yourself because you, what, fought Kyungsoo over a warrant?"

"This isn't about Kyungsoo, Jongdae. Stop it." Junmyeon glares at him, which the younger ignores dutifully as he finishes eating his popsicle rather loudly, like a child. "But I do feel bad... I got mad at him today and last Friday about it..." He lets out another groan and buries his head in his arms.

"Oh, hyung." Jongdae tuts ruefully. "I'm sure he still finds you attractive, even if you get worked up over a B&E."

"Fuck off." Junmyeon throws out an arm presumably to hit Jongdae, but he misses because his head is still down, and it brushes against the latter's shoulder in a halfhearted attempt at best. "Leave me alone to wallow in my shame."

Jongdae laughs at that and shakes his head again, smiling. Junmyeon has always been in denial about his feelings towards his partner, but it's obvious that he cares for him and his opinion a lot. Maybe he just doesn't know yet, but his passive-aggressiveness is turning out to be just a bad schoolboy crush. Oh, well. He pats Junmyeon's head gently and laughs at the long sigh he receives in return. They'll figure it out sooner or later. They're the best detectives of Seoul National Police, after all. If they can dismantle gangs and conduct elaborate drug busts on a normal day, they can make sense of their feelings. Hopefully.

 

 

(Below them, as he makes his way towards the District Attorney's Office, Kyungsoo hugs the case file to his chest and mentally berates himself for messing up badly in front of Junmyeon and Captain Choi, but more so rejecting the elder's offer of company. The walk to the DA isn't long, just a few blocks from the precinct, and Kyungsoo usually enjoys these tiny moments of solitude especially since he works in a stressful, noisy environment. But today, somehow, each step feels heavy, the road seems to stretch on forever, and instead of calm, Kyungsoo feels lonely.

He's probably just hungry. Better drop off the warrant request so he can eat and hopefully dissipate the uneasiness in his gut.)

**Author's Note:**

> *walks in more than a year later with a shitty intro fic and iced coffee* wassup
> 
> HELLO IT'S ME back at it again with a series that I will for sure abandon for weeks at a time! After binging B99 last Christmas I decided to make my own because why the hell not. Will I do one of the best tv shows justice with this AU? Nope. Will it be accurate af with Seoul's actual police force? Hell no. But I got a list of plots ready to be written, so buckle up and enjoy the shenanigans, I guess ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> KEY POINTS OF THE AU:  
> 1\. While it is based on B99, I will not follow its story nor its characterizations! Some episodes will come up eventually (ready your 0% fat peanuts, wink wonk) but I will not do the Doug Judy arcs or whatever.  
> 2\. MOST OF THE INFORMATION RE: SEOUL NATIONAL POLICE IS FICTITIOUS. There is no 99th precinct in Seoul, even. This AU incorporates multiple information (e.g. NYPD subdivisions) that are legal and binding in their source states, but not as a whole.  
> 3\. Apologies in advance for those knowledgeable in South Korean penal laws if the crimes I will be using is actually not punishable in their jurisdiction. I'm using my knowledge from criminal law in my country + felonies as portrayed in B99!  
> 4\. Unless stated, nothing is chronological.
> 
> Tell me about what you think down below or in my [Twitter](http://twitter.com/apaixon0)!! What episodes would you like me to try and write even if I can barely breathe with my law readings? :-)
> 
> (catch the no spoiler endgame reference and i will give u a cookie. or a chris evans gif. or both.)


End file.
